Ok, enough with the optimism.... I'm sick of being sick! Tired of being tired. Tired of the immobility (remnants of the spinal tumor), tired of my digestive system (lost another 10 pounds this week), tired of all the trips to DHMC. LAB work, CAT scans, PET scans; sounds more like an animal hospital than a world class cancer center.
It would be nice to hit the rewind button back 2 or 3 years when I felt great. When I get through all this, I'll sure appreciate things more.
But for now... I'm not having fun.
Alright, now the news of the day. I went in for my normal routine (Labs, consult w/ Dr. Reddy, and infusion) today. Labs came back and my white blood counts are shot, almost non-existent. This was somewhat expected with the more aggressive chemo regimen I am now on.
So for now I'm in my own version of isolation (at home, limited exposure to others, face masks, lots and lots of hand washing), and if you have a cold, or are otherwise sick in any way, I need to keep my distance, etc. The good news is that my counts should recover by next weekend. Then I'll have another round of chemo.
The other good news is that my LDH levels continue to drop, which indicates that I am responding to the misery.
So this has been my one (and hopefully only) complaining blog...
Blaine
It would be nice to hit the rewind button back 2 or 3 years when I felt great. When I get through all this, I'll sure appreciate things more.
But for now... I'm not having fun.
Alright, now the news of the day. I went in for my normal routine (Labs, consult w/ Dr. Reddy, and infusion) today. Labs came back and my white blood counts are shot, almost non-existent. This was somewhat expected with the more aggressive chemo regimen I am now on.
So for now I'm in my own version of isolation (at home, limited exposure to others, face masks, lots and lots of hand washing), and if you have a cold, or are otherwise sick in any way, I need to keep my distance, etc. The good news is that my counts should recover by next weekend. Then I'll have another round of chemo.
The other good news is that my LDH levels continue to drop, which indicates that I am responding to the misery.
So this has been my one (and hopefully only) complaining blog...
Blaine
BTW-Dani sent me this photo of Mt. Timpanogas. This is where I grew up.
Oh Blaine I wish I could take away your pain, your cancer, your suffering! I pray for you daily and know that OUR GOD IS A GOD OF MIRACLES! He and He along is the Divine Physician! He loves you so very much and is right there by your side - God Bless you always
ReplyDeleteJuanita Sweet
Oh, Blaine.....you know how I LOVE it when you are so REAL!! ;-)
ReplyDeleteSeriously though, you have more than enough to complain about and you would not be human if you were not feeling pretty worn down. I can relate in a small way to your wish to have appreciated your health when you had it. Anytime I have had a sickness that has knocked me on my butt (albeit for only a week or two), I always think to myself, "Now why don't I appreciate how good I feel normally?" and vow to do better in the future. I don't think it's really in our natures to notice our bodies until they refuse to do what we want them to. You've given us a good reminder to be grateful for what we've got.
Much love,
Alanna
You go right ahead and do a little complaining...sometimes it just feels better to let it all out, then it is easier to get back to being more upbeat again. Our prayers and thoughts are with you daily, and we know God is and will be with your every step of the way.
ReplyDeleteWhat did you think you were going to offend us if you complained? After all you have been through with this disease - you have a right to let go some times and just rant! That okay - because you are human - and we all can't have great days every day...some days just go to hell quicker than others! And, that's okay - because it makes us appreciate the okay, good, and wonderful days...
ReplyDeleteLove you and the family! Take care - and I'm keeping you in my prayers...
BTW - love the photo!